Lost tribe of Westwood

GREAT AMERICAN COMEBACKS


When in England at a fairly large conference, Colin Powell was
asked by the Archbishop of Canterbury if our plans for Iraq were
just an example of empire building by George Bush.

He answered by saying, 'Over the years, the United States has sent
many of its fine young men and women into great peril to fight for
freedom beyond our borders. The only amount of land we have ever
asked for in return is enough to bury those that did not return.

It became very quiet in the room.

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At a conference in France where a number of international engineers
were taking part, including French and American.

During a break one of the French engineers came back into the room
saying 'Have you heard the latest dumb stunt Bush has done? He has
sent an aircraft carrier to Indonesia to help the tsunami victims.
What does he intended to do, bomb them?'

A Boeing engineer stood up and replied quietly: 'Our carriers have
three hospitals on board that can treat several hundred people;
they are nuclear powered and can supply emergency electrical power
to shore facilities; they have three cafeterias with the capacity
to feed 3,000 people three meals a day, they can produce several
thousand gallons of fresh water from sea water each day, and they
carry half a dozen helicopters for use in transporting victims and
injured to and from their flight deck.. We have eleven such ships;
how many does France have?'

Once again, dead silence.

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A U.S Navy Admiral was attending a n aval conference that included
Admirals from the U.S. , English, Canadian, Australian and French
navies. At a cocktail reception, he found himself standing with a
large group of officers that included personnel from most of those
countries. Everyone was chatting away in English as they sipped
their drinks but a French admiral suddenly complained that,
'whereas Europeans learn many languages, Americans learn only
English.' He then asked, 'Why is it that we always have to speak
English in these conferences rather than speaking French?'

Without hesitating, the American Admiral replied 'Maybe it's
because the Brits, Canadians, Aussies and Americans arranged it so
you wouldn't have to speak German'

You could have heard a pin drop


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AND THIS STORY FITS RIGHT IN WITH THE ABOVE

A group of Americans, retired teachers, recently went to France on
a tour. Robert Whiting, an elderly gentleman of 83, arrived in
Paris by plane.

At French Customs, he took a few minutes to locate his passport in
his carry on. "You have been to France before, monsieur?" the
customs officer asked sarcastically.

Mr. Whiting admitted that he had been to France previously.

"Then you should know enough to have your passport ready."

The American said, "The last time I was here, I didn't have to show
it."

"Impossible. Americans always have to show your passports on
arrival in France !"

The American senior gave the Frenchman a long hard look. Then he
quietly explained. "Well, when I came ashore at Omaha Beach on D-
Day in '44 to help liberate this country, I couldn't find any
Frenchmen to show it to."


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